Death sucks.

I'm not really a crier... I used to be, but there was a point in my life when it seemed like I had just run out.  I didn't have any tears left, and though the pain was still as real for me as for anyone else, I had lost the need to cry.  I don't think it's a problem, since everyone deals with grief in their own way, and my way just so happens to be different. 

Bring on the raging hormones. 

Being pregnant makes me well up at commercials.  It's foreign to me.  I don't know what to do with myself.

A friend of mine lost a dad this week.  Neither Husband nor I have living fathers anymore.  His died shortly after our wedding (almost exactly nine years ago), and mine four and a half years ago.  We still grieve.  Our lives were changed in such remarkable ways.  Our children won't have a grandfather, and as someone who grew up with all her grandparents (and still have my own grandfather), it's sometimes really hard to take. 

Hearing that someone else is walking where we have brings up all the pain again.  It sucks.  I hate that they need to feel this, and go through it, as much as I hate the fact that I understand all too well.  

Death is guaranteed.  There is nothing we can do to stop it, and nothing we can do to predict it, but it still hurts like hell sometimes, and I guess we just have to let it.