I was curious about what other moms think about loveys, comfort items, blankies, etc. When Girl was born I made a somewhat conscious effort to avoid them if possible. I know that doctors say things like it makes them able to cope with stuff, or offers them comfort, but the vision of Girl dragging around some raggedy blanket, or filthy toy kind of grossed me out. Not to mention the constant fear of losing the irreplacable item. I just figured, it would be easier all around if we just skipped that altogether. I never really had a single comfort item that I know of, and I seem fairly able to cope with hardship, so I doubt it will cause permanent harm.
Girl never seems to mind. She has a nice rotation of animals in her bed, something new to cuddle with every few nights. The only constant is her blanket, which she seems fine with leaving in there. We've gone away, and as long as I bring any one of a variety of stuffed animals, she doesn't seem to have any problem sleeping.
I don't know, I guess I see having a lovey as kind of like sucking one's thumb. It's a more acceptable version, since it doesn't require orthodontics, but I always worry it's like a crutch. I know, I know, kids grow out of it (you hope... I had a friend in her teens that still needed her blankie to sleep) and I just figured if I could avoid the "ok, it's time to take this away" period, all the better.
I did force a soother on Girl, when she was an infant, but it was gone by the time she was 6 months old (she barely noticed). I just did that to avoid thumb sucking (which is a lot more difficult to take away).
Am I a horrible parent? Should I allow her to have special items, or is a nice well-rounded familiarity of loved toys enough? Let me clarify, I haven't actually taken away toys I thought were loveys, I've just always rotated, and she has always been happy with that. I would think it's fine. She is well adjusted, deals with stress like any other under-2 I've ever known. I just really don't want her to ever feel dependant on a "thing" for stress relief.. be that, a thumb, a blanket, food, etc.
We'll see how that works out.
J has one he sleeps with and took out of the house for a few months, but stopped. He now has an addition, but rarely takes it out of the house. If he grabs it on the way out- I'm fine with it because for now, the kitty is his friend he talks to and feeds, etc. He doesn't insist on having it all the time, so I feel there is a balance I'm comfortable with. I don't like the idea of having to have that one often-dirty object all the time either. I'd say if it works for the both of you, then it works!
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